Wednesday, 11 June 2008

• Firsts

  Parenting is full of firsts and surprises, some of them pleasant and others where the anticipation of them leads to anxiety.  First poops.  First smiles.  Rolling.  Crawling.  Walking.  First words.  First day of school.  First time wearing a formal dress and attending an adults only party.  Last night my husband and I took our baby to his graduation party and left our older two sons with a babysitter.  It was the first time that we had gone out alone at night for longer than an hour or so and left the boys with someone other than a family member.  It was an adult party and we knew that it would be difficult to manage two very active little ones--they are almost 3 and almost 4 years old this month at a fancy restaurant.  I dreaded looking for a babysitter.  Our children go everywhere with us.  They did stay alone with their grandmother a few times when she was staying with us, but other than that and one time when I left them with a friend to go to an ultrasound appointment, they were babysitter virgins so to speak.  Our families don't live close by, so even staying alone with their grandparents or aunts and uncles is a rare event.  My husband's friend stayed with them and all in all, it was a good experience for them.  They did want to go with us to that party, but M is someone who they've known since they were a year or so old.  He comes to eat dinner with us quite a bit, and they see him outside playing soccer with their daddy.  They look forward to it when my husband's friends come over and overall, all of my husband's friends are good with children.  M took them outside to play and they had a good time.  They were still awake around 10:30pm when we returned from the party and not in their pajamas, but I didn't really expect that they would be. 

  Meanwhile at the party, I experienced another first--nursing in public while wearing a formal dress.  At first I thought that it would not be possible--my dress did not have any buttons or zippers in the front.  I feared that I would have to spend the night in the bathroom breastfeeding my daughter or walking the halls of the restaurant trying to calm her crying.  The first hour or so of the party she slept in her stroller.  When she woke up hungry, I was able to pull my breast out of my dress and use my shawl to discreetly nurse her while eating.  None of my friends or their husbands said anything.  Then came dancing.  My husband and I danced with her in our arms and had a great time.  At one point she started crying loudly, I think it was because the Indian music that was playing was way too loud, there were too many people for her tastes, and she was getting tired.  I took her to a quieter place and swayed with her and nursed her until she slept.  At that point we left the party.  I don't know if we'll be going to any parties any time soon because we're mostly homebodies and not the dressing up type.  We go to the beach, to the park, to the mall play area, and other family friendly places.  It's nice to know, though, that our children are at a stage where they are okay with being with people other than my husband and I or our families.

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